WHO I AM
On June 27, 2013, I will be starting a new adventure in my new life of sobriety. My past life of selfishness, fear and self-centered behavior finally caught up with me on February 8, 2013 when I was arrested for DUI for the 3rd time following an accident in which thankfully no one was hurt.
Jefferson County Kentucky does not take this lightly and I have (or rather will be) been sentenced to 90 days of jail with work release, followed by 90 days of home incarceration. This may seem like a harsh sentence and to be sure there are some darker days ahead. However, I am don't choose to look at it that way.
I have been and am extremely fortunate.
First, I did not kill anyone. I did not hurt anyone. I will be and am eternally thankful for that.
Second, I got my family back as a result of this. My brothers and I had not been close for years...no we are, albeit not in optimal circumstances but we are.
Third, I found out that I have true, solid friends who love me. They were always there. I just had shied away from them over the past several years as I tried to become part of that farce known as Louisville society.
Fourth, I found out who my friends were not. For this I am thankful. I do not need fake or superficial people in my life. No criticism. Just not me.
Fifth (but really first), I dedicated myself to AA and living the 12-steps. I know that sounds sort of ridiculous and almost insincere and trust me that is how I used to feel and sometimes still do feel when people talk about AA. But I am just glad that I have been able to embrace this way of life and no, its not just not drinking...its really a way
On June 27, 2013, I will be turning myself in to start the 180 day journey and this blog is going to document my journey.
During the first 90 days, I will be able to come to my office, go to meetings and generally live a professional life but will have little to no access to my home.
In the second 90 days, I will sleep at home rather than at the jail but other than that my life will not change all that much - except that I will have TV and can cook etc.
I could make this into a pity party. I am not.
I could let my fear cause me to lose what I have. I am not.
I could look for sympathy and pity. I am not.
I used to do all of that but I cant do that any more...its a waste of time and energy.
What I am doing is to continue the change that started after I woke up in jail and become the man my mother thinks I already am.
What I am doing is to make amends to the people I hurt, to get myself into shape, to be the best son, brother, former husband, uncle and friend I can be and to live the life I want to live.
What I am doing is expanding my intellectual and spiritual life and living life according to the program of Alcoholics Anonymous and in a spiritual relationship with God that will allow me to be useful to others.
This is my last chance.
.
Where I stand now and where I want to be:
SOBRIETY
I have been sober for 130 days. At the end, I will be sober about 320 days. Because no matter what, my sobriety comes first.
SPIRITUALLY
I need to expand my meditation and to work the steps on an Honest, Open and Willing basis.
PHYSICALLY
I used to be a huge runner and weight lifter. I stopped that after Feb. I have gained 30 pounds. I want to lose that weight and start an exercise program using only the things that are available to me.
DIET
I plan to give up gluten and get my diet to where it used to be and should stay. I am going to drink a lot of water and watch gluten
